Coprolites are the new rage…

I read that Bill Bryson book in Boise when we were waiting to move to Madison. Really liked it. Speaking of hearsay of goings on in Arizona, we had some friends of ours over last week and the wife told us that one of her friends from BYU is currently in Mark’s ward in Arizona. She described him as “kind of BYU weird, except he’s not at BYU anymore…you know the kind of quirky that would be OK if you’re in Provo, but not OK if you’re not at BYU anymore.” It was clear to me that this girl, whoever she was, was unable to comprehend the magnitude of Awesomeness that is Mark “I’m pretty much the world’s greatest kisser, I mean, after all, I am an” Eliason. So I think that the scene with only one person laughing at Jenson is probably true to a greater or lesser extent of all of us now that we’ve dispersed throughout the wider world. Except perhaps for John Stoffer, because that man will ooze cool, like a slug’s underbelly, wherever he goes. For example, a couple of weeks ago in Priesthood the teacher was asking us to list all of Satan’s corruptions of good things, and everyone was taking it way too seriously, so I shouted out “the New York Yankees,” and then one guy laughed, and everybody else just kind of ignored it. It didn’t get written on the chalkboard. Damn Yankees indeed, I thought.

Bill Bryson

Hey everybody – well, I’m back in Phoenix. Jenson, as soon as Trevor Weed and I get a place, you’re coming over for dinner. Just so everyone knows – you will all appreciate this – Jenson is in the same ward as my sister. He spoke in sacrament last week, and this is what my sister said: “He was so funny, and I was laughing really hard. But I looked around and no one else was laughing.” And I thought about all the awkward moments at ward prayer or in sacrament, when we all laughed at something or other, whether it was Jenson, or Howard, or whoever, and no one else got it, and I thought, that is hilarious.
I have been reading this pretty awesome book “A Short History of Nearly Everything”, and it is really funny and really interesting. One thing that I learned lately is that someone other than Howard has had an intense interest in fossilized feces, otherwise known as “coprolites.” His name was the Reverend William Buckland. He was an Oxford professor of geology, and he actually had a table made entirely out of his collection of coprolites. Charles Darwin thought he was a buffoon. Anyway, that was something really interesting that I read recently, and I thought you would all like to know it. May your lives be healthy and good! Peace.

new job

in case you hadn’t heard yet, i officially have a new job. i even have to dress up and stuff. kinda weird but it’s nice to get a steady paycheck. i work for utah community credit union (uccu) in the accounting department. i’m not actually an accountant but i do a lot of the same stuff. i’m actually responsible for the atm operations for the whole credit union. it’s a decent job so far.

i was most proud of myself during the job interview when they asked what i do when i get stressed out and i said, “you just have to put your head down and power through.” i almost laughed but managed to keep it down. looks like all that arrested development came through for me in the end…

I was listening to NPR…

this morning and I heard Garrison Keillor’s The Writer’s Almanac. In any case, I discovered that today (July 12) happens to be the birthday of both Henry David Thoreau and Pablo Neruda. Amazing how the stars converge to produce the 19th century’s worst lover and the 20th century’s greatest lover. Who know’s what the 21st century will bring, only I hope it has something to do with robotlove and Spencer and Emeline’s future offspring. Peace

Hey hey from Longggggg Middle School!

Hello gentlemen –

First of all, Jordan – that was a truly awesome tribute to America, particularly with the flag waving in the background. And I was glad to hear that ol’ Charlie Butler showed up to help flip flapjacks.
Things at Teach for America are going well. I’m really tired right now, because I am up every morning at 5 am and in bed, at the soonest, around eleven. The kids are doing well; sort of. There are a lot of challenges involved in this whole teaching business, but I am certainly learning a lot….and the culture outside of BYU is interesting because it revolves completely around the bar scene. It is so funny how much more friendly some girls are after they’ve been liquored up a little. Anyway, good times ahead, I’m looking forward to heading back to Phoenix for some good times with T. Weed. And, John Stoffer Howard…it doesn’t get much more awesome than that. Keep on rocking –

Mark

Hawaii Cruise

So maybe the coolest thing about being on a cruise ship is the radical entertainment. On my ship their was a comedy duo called FULL IMPACT. It consisted of one old guy that was “Old School” and one young guy that was “New School.” The young guy of course had some weird facial hair and a backwards baseball cap and the old guy looked just like Telly Savalas. They would do stuff like say, “I like my music old school.” and then sing a song from the 50’s. The new school guy would then say I like my music new school and then Young MC’s”Bust a Move” would come on over the speakers and he would kind of dance. After that they would normally pick two women from the audience and do that thing where the woman is pretending to be one of the guys from FULL IMPACT’s hands and she would have to follow along with what brilliant comedy was then spewed forth. The “New School” Guy always got the woman to touch his chest and the “Old School” Guy always was upset with the woman doing the hands. It was fresh comedy. I saw them twice.