Oh man, this is seriously awesome….

Did you guys ever watch Inspector Gadget growing up? I remember always thinking that Inspector Gadget was kind of a nutjob, but always being impressed with how smart his sidekick, Penny, was. She always had that computer book that seemed to know everything. Well guess what? I found that computer book. It is not a figment of our imaginations. If you have not seen this website already, you definitely need to check it out:

http://www.wolframalpha.com/

So much data! That’s it. And Jenson, I might just take you up on that little challenge, as I do have a week off…

Father in law’s house


So I live in my father in law’s house now while he’s on a mission. This is a picture of me reenacting that cliff jumping scene from Magnum PI in the backyard. In related news there is a new song challenge. Its time to man up Eliason and quit living off your past glories. Life is meant to be lived in the now.
http://songwritingchallenge.blogspot.com/

What Jon is Really Doing in Bermuda

Hey guys,

After Jon had described some of his activities in Bermuda (research, cave-diving, etc.) and some of his compatriots (a mysterious Tom, the BZS girls, etc.), I grew a little bit suspicious of what he was up to. So I reached out to some contacts I have in Bermuda, who sent me the following footage. Turns out, Tom is actually Tom Selleck, and Jon has changed his style and is now going by the name of Higgins.

And when he says he’s going cave-diving, this is what he’s really talking about:

Bermuda… again

My first week has come to a close and what a week it has been. I woke up this morning to a crowing rooster outside my window, this is not because I live near a farm but because chickens have overrun the island. The funny thing though is that with all the wild chickens on the island I never see any chicken road kill. I guess chickens are smarter than we thought, or at least smarter than most squirrels. Poor squirrels. Speaking of roads, I think the drivers on these roads have learned to break the laws of physics, primarily that no two objects can occupy the same space. Because even though they are all 2 lanes, they are driven like 4 lane roads constantly, especially by the motorbikes. These guys must exist on a separate plane of reality because they seem to move through traffic independently of what the car traffic is doing. I also must assume all cars here are equipped with radar because almost all drivers (even the cars) seem to be completely comfortable with passing each other even if they can only see the next hundred feet of road. My week has consisted primarily of hiking around to cave sites and dealing with computer issues. Hiking around can get very hot with all the equipment I carry meaning that when I am done I sometimes look like I jumped into the ocean. Between the cave dirt and my sweating, I am not sure if any of my cloth will survive this trip. Hiking around also makes me way hungry but they have these cool wild cherries here so I eat them a lot. Other than that, I try to eat from home as much as possible to save money. We had a party last night for some BZS people which was a nice chance to get to know some other people in the area. They all seemed interested in what I was doing and most said they would like to buddy up with me while I go out some time. I hope they have cars because Tom (my PI)rented a motor bike for us while he was here and I got a little spoiled by it. Public Trans in Bermuda pretty much sucks, many bus routes only come once an hour and some stop by 5pm. But I am on my own now, so I have to make due with what I have. One issue I am learning about right now is permission. About 1/3of all the caves I am sampling require some form of permission to be in. And a couple of the land owners have a deep seeded hatred for Tom because he saved their caves when they wanted to make a shiny new hotel in place of them. So Tom has been unofficially telling me to just sneak into those caves near night fall for the sampling and to not mention his name if caught. I just need to play like a dumb tourist. One last thing I did this week was I had a 2nd chance to go snorkeling while Tom was diving a cave. It was once again amazing with thousands of fish and I even saw a huge Morey Eel. I also went snorkeling with some BZS girls in a cave today, which is good way relaxing after a long hike. Cave water also tends to be very clear as long as you do not stir up the bottom. To be honest I cannot fathom why someone would go into a boring old swimming pool in Bermuda. The guests at St. Georges are crazy. Anyway I can’t think of too much more to say for now so I guess I’ll sign off.

Don’t Worry, I’m Chuck Norris

So if you haven’t read Jon’s post about being in Bermuda you should read that below.

Rose is compiling a publication for the govt. agency she works for called “Intern Corner.” One of the questions she posed to the interns was: “Which cartoon character would you be?”

She said she would be Toph from Avatar the Last Airbender and I said I would be Chuck Norris from the Chuck Norris cartoon. She didn’t believe that there was one, so I had to look in up on YouTube to show her. Here is what I found.

Reminds me of Howard at that girl from Wisconsin’s house whose name I can’t remember right now

Bermuda

So I just got into Bermuda and I can tell this is going to be a wild time. Leaving the small airport I was quick to realize how disorientating it is to see people driving on the wrong side of the road. I still feel like we are going to crash every time my driver changes roads. First thing we did was check into my apt. They were unsure about the person I am renting from but things have worked out so far so here is hoping my luck holds. My place is $550 a week which is incredibly cheap for Bermuda. But the club has this $50 mandatory food bill. Basically I have to eat at least $50 worth of food from the St. Georges club restaurant. Pretty silly huh? The apt. is very nice; the biggest room is oddly the bathroom. But I have no internet in my apt ($10 per day!) so it is a pain right now to email cause I had to find a local free hot spot.
My first day I went snorkeling. Gil (a friend of Tom’s) took me to a local cave he was diving that day since Tom was not in yet. While he went down I pattled around the coast line in my snorkel gear. It was definitely the best snorkeling I have ever done before. The mouth of the cave and the rocks along the coast were teaming with life. Colorful fish ranging from a couple centimeters to about 1.5 feet. I even found (and got inked by) a school of cuddle fish. They can change color so fast, it is pretty cool. I probably examined at least half a mile of coast on this dive. Later that night we went to a dinner party thrown by the BZS. I got to meet a few people and eat a ton of good food. Fish, steak, kabobs, chicken, you really missed out dad. Then everyone insisted I try fish and chips and I must say… I was not very good at all (but I said it was great) basically it is a potato wedge like what you get at the school café and a beaded fish flavored thing worthy of McDonalds with vinegar and salt poured on top… so ya… whatever. Anyway after eating half a cow I went home meet up with Tom and hit the sack.
The next day (sun) I to the bus to church parched. We had no water in our apt. that morning. Pretty small ward here, and meet up with all my future buddies some seemed pretty interested in helping me and I think the missionaries were excited at the prospect of doing more adventurous things with me as service so hopefully buddies will be no problem for me. After church I meet up with the others and we hit up a gas station for lunch (we have not made it to the grocery store yet) $7.50 for a gas station sandwich, welcome to Bermuda. After that it was time to hit up the caves. We meet up with a couple very attractive girls in their twenties who work at BZS and went leap frogging from cave/pool to cave/pool. Very beautiful place the water in these pools come in 3 colors, deep blue, light teal and crystal clear. We hit up about 18 cave pools that day some were open surface and other required a bit of caving to get to. In one of the coastal pools we found a lot of fish including a parrot fish and a barracuda. After we ran out of steam we finished up the day at a popular local restaurant and had more excellent food. I had the Nacho explosion, it was huge and awesome. It was also only $13.50. Most restaurant meals here are about $15-$20. After that we went home showered and went to bed.
Anyway I should go so we can do today’s adventure.
Jonathan

JEEEEEEOOOOORRBB!

So I got a phone call out of the blue last week.

It was from a Federal Magistrate Judge in Las Vegas telling me that the clerk he had hired for this fall from ASU dropped out because she got engaged. Then he offered me the position as his clerk.

He was in the stake presidency in my home stake when I was in high school and college and he comes to DC 3-4 times a year for conferences. So he’s taken me and Rose out to dinner 3-4 times a year for 3 years. Anyway, he said when his clerk dropped out he thought about whose life he could disrupt and gave me the opportunity.

So it looks like we’re moving back to Las Vegas. We love DC and don’t want to go, but when the manna from heaven falls, you eat it. We can always come back.

The best part about it is that I’ve been praying for a job a lot and couldn’t figure out how I was going to find one and then one just falls out of the sky – and a federal clerkship at that! God is watching out for us.

Here’s a little article the Judge wrote.

Link